The days are finally getting longer, the sun is staying in the sky, and the snow seems desperately trying to gain a purchase, but is being dragged away by the oncoming march of warmer weather. When the last snowfall hits, the skies begin to turn blue, and the leaves return, there is only one thing I look for; rain. The first great deluge of the year. See, for the entirety of winter, layer upon layer of salt has blanketed the roads until it forms a white crust. But once the rain hits, the mana from heaven washes it all away leaving pristine and clean expanses of tarmac.
And in this world, there is only one way to enjoy that. In the saddle of a motorcycle.
So this year, I browsed around and managed to find one that not only tickled my fancy, but grabbed hold of it and took it to places I never dreamed of. Now, I realize that not many people I know ride; essentially it’s only my wife and I. So, with the day hitting possibly 50 for the first time this year, I want to walk you through what it’s like. What it’s like to own a motorcycle.
Specifically, what it will be like to own this one:
A 2009 Honda VFR-800 Interceptor.
Now, I know the first thing you notice is the headlamps, and how it looks like it’s had an appointment with an overeager plastic surgeon for a facelift, but that has a purpose. See, when most people envision a street bike, even many who ride it, they picture this:
This is a Yamaha R1 leaning into a corner with such force that the pegs nearly scrape the concrete. It’s a 998cc Inline 4 DOHC engine that reaches peak power at an astronomical 12,500 rpms. And you’ll need to take it that far, because this is the hardest of the hardcore crotch rockets. The windscreen is low-profile and bulged to accommodate a helmet while in a full-race tuck. The pegs are high and slug rearward, to keep out of the way as you lean into a hair-pin. The suspension is firm with the chassis inflexible and rigid, to better allow you to sling the bike from one extreme angle to the other as you make your way around MidOhio or something.
The only problem is, there’s only one Valentino Rossi, and odds are, you’re not him. In fact, I’m willing to be out of the entire population of motorcycle riders out there, maybe 5% can take this bike to the limit of what it can do. And that’s where it’s happiest, because that’s what you’re paying for. This bike is just….staggering. But it’s also useless.
To compare it to a car, it’s basically like buying a Formula 2 car. It’s blisteringly fast, face-ripping quick, but in traffic? And are you really going to want to drop it down one or two gears to get into the power band to pass a truck on the highway? And then kick it back up to 6th to cruise? Imagine driving along in your car and every time you wanted to do something, you had to turn off the radio, turn on the windshield wipers and only then could you get enough power to the engine to pass a car on the highway. I mean, really, do you want to bother with all that?
But the Interceptor is different. The handlebars are wider, and further back, providing a more comfortable riding posture. And because the handlebars are wider, and the wheels just a bit further apart, it’s more planted too. You’ll feel confident enough that you can ride to the limit of what you can, and the bike won’t rip your head off and vomit down your neck. And while it only has about 800cc’s worth of power compared to the 998cc’s of the Yamaha, they’re torquier and further down in the midrange, where you’ll actually use them.
Now, at this point, I want to explain something. This:
Is a Bugatti Veyron. It is the single most powerful, and most expensive production car on the planet. It’s quad-turbocharged 8.0 liter W-16 engine produces an earth-shattering 1,001 horsepower. It will reach, and this has been verified, 253 mph. That’s 1/3 the speed of sound at sea level. It is probably the fastest production car we will see in our lifetime.
But the interesting thing is this. Even at 1,001 bhp, it’s something called ‘power-to-weight ratio’ that is what’s really important. A freight train can produce far more horsepower than the Veyron, but it’s hard pressed to go any faster than maybe 60 mph. And it’s all down to weight. The Veyron is handicapped because it’s a car, and needs all the usual car bits that we and the government deem necessary. So for each pound it puts on, it needs more power to push that pound along, and more power means more engine, which means more weight, which means more power, and well, you see where this is going. Hence why getting a car to 253 mph needs so much from the engine; for every one more mile an hour you push a car, mother nature in the form of wind resistance, road friction, and that mother of all speed limiters; heat, is going to be pushing the car back. So you need to keep the weight as small as possible.
The Bugatti Veyron weighs in at a grand total of 4,160 lbs (or 1,888 kg), with it putting out 1,001 bhp. So the power-to-weight ratio is – 389.8 W/kg. Which is very, very good. For comparison, a Ford Focus with a 2.0 liter engine does about 94 W/kg. But here’s what you have to consider…
I’ll never own a Bugatti Veyron. Neither will you. In fact, since this car has been in production since 2005, only 133 have ever been produced. And the reason is pretty obvious; the car costs 1.5 million dollars. 1.5 million. You can comfortably retire with that much.
Now, the Honda Interceptor costs about $9,000. So with taxes, and interest on the loan, it’ll cost me maybe around $10k. Which is probably what a car payment for a Veyron is. Then again, if you need a loan to buy a Veyron, you probably shouldn’t buy one….
Regardless, the Honda Interceptor, with it’s weaker engine, more comfortable ride height, better ergonomics, and all the things that we and Uncle Sam say it needs, weighs in at 481 lbs (218.2 kg). And it’s engine will produce about 107 bhp. Which is actually about 30 bhp less than that Focus I mentioned earlier. But here’s what you have to remember; that 107 bhp engine? It’s only pushing you, itself, 2 wheels, and some tin foil down the road. So it’s power-to-weight ratio?
490.3 W/kg. That’s over 100 more than the Veyron. That’s more than a McLaren F1, or an Ultima GTR. And it costs less than the Focus. In fact, you could probably get 2 for the price of that Ford.
And you know what else? It doesn’t come with electronic steering dampers, traction control brakes, doors, windows, seatbelts, air condition, a stereo, a rear window, any of this other bullshit that just weighs down a car and removes you from the world. No, it’s a partner, not a nanny as you go down the road. You lean, and it turns. Each bump in the road is transmitted directly to your hands, and the engine vibration and gear changes are mechanically communicated to your feet. It talks to you, telling you what’s going on, and eager to take commands. It’s the ultimate co-pilot.
And look at it! You can just tell it’s not designed by a committee, it had to be done by some madman on a board who was pissed off at his boss and vented the energy on a piece of paper. The exhaust has four pipes in a V-formation underneath the seat. The angles on that thing look like something sent from the future! Look at the shape of the tail lamps, and how it continues the contours of the rear. Even the single-sided swing arm for the rear wheel, garishly showing off the rims. Oh man, this bike is so much more than transportation. It is absolute nirvana.
So to all of you out there who see a Ferrari or a Porsche and think, ‘Wow, I bet that car goes fast’. Please. The only thing about those cars that I like are how they look in my rear-view mirror as I blow by them on something that costs about as much as their insurance premium. Those cars can do 0-60 in maybe 5 seconds. I can do it in less than 4. And I’ll be doing it on half as many tires.
So this, this is the reason why I can’t wait for the first rain of spring. I want those roads washed and clean when I go out there. I want to hear them scream in protest as I twist my right hand and lean into another turn. This is why I love spring.
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